February 26, 2010

Sawyer is getting so big. I am so sad and so excited at the same time. He is starting to get a little personality which is so fun. Here are some of the things he does and what are days are like. I'm sure it's not as exciting as all of yours, but it's fun for us.
He smiles all the time
He laughs, but not all the time and it's usually at night
He tries so hard to talk back to you
He sings when I sing to him I love that it's so sweet
He tries to sit up, but he just can't do it and he gets so frustrated
He loves bath time finally!
He thinks two in the morning is play time instead of bed time and he just wants to smile
He loves my parents they can just look at him and he gets the biggest smile on his face
He will always fall asleep for braydon at night but not for me.
We are usually up around 4 am for the day because it's not fun to sleep
We don't really go out anywhere because of rsv it's so bad right now
We watch a lot of movies together and a lot of trashy reality tv... sorry mom
He is happy most of the time, but if he's hungry and i'm not fast enough at getting him food he gets very upset and will start to scream. Once he starts eating he is fine!
He loves braydon so much. It's so sweet to watch them together he loves to help his daddy study and loves when daddy can make it home in time for bath time
He has a hard time walking up he gets a little confused and gets scared very easily
He makes us so happy and has changed our lives so much. I can't believe he hasn't been in our lives longer. He just makes my heart melt. Even when he is sleeping at night I just stare at him because i can't take my eyes off him.

February 11, 2010

Random thoughts

So I have been thinking a lot lately about this sad story i'm about to share. A family my mom knows down south had a very sad thing happen in their family. Their son committed suicide. That in itself is a tragedy, but what the mother found after his death makes this very hearbreaking. She found e-mails, notes, and text messages from people in his school (he was a sr. going to graduate this year) She said what these kids said to her son were some of the most awful things any person could say or any person could hear. She said it was very painful to even read. My brother ben is a sr. and i can't imagine people saying such awful things to hurt him in that way. Why are people so cruel? I know kids are so mean to eachother. The mother went to her sons grave sight and there was a note from a girl that said she didn't attend his funeral because she didn't want to be a hipacrite and pretend she was nice to him like everyone else who attended to try and make themselves feel better. What is wrong with people? I am so sad for this mother. I am so sad for those kids who did and said such awful things to this boy that i've never met. I am just sick about it. It's hard to explain how our life changed after my brother and sister died. It's hard to explian how my mom and dad changed, but now that i'm a mom I feel like i understand a little bit more of what that did to them even though i don't really know. It breaks my heart that this mother had to say goodbye to her son to early and that it was a very sad way for her to let him go. It's just good that we have the gospel. Then on the other end of the spectrum I was watching "hope for haiti" and there was this story about a mother who pulled herself out of the rubble and could hear her infant son crying. She dug and dug for hours and hours and could still hear him, but his cries were getting weaker and weaker. A day went by and she was still digging. This mother dug for her baby for 50 hours and finally help came and her son was pulled out alive. What a beautiful story. I couldn't help but cry as I was holding my son. If you asked me a year ago if i'd dig 50 hours i don't know what i'd say but after having this beautiful baby I would dig until the very end. I want to be like thatmom and not like those unkind people. I want to be better then that. I will continue to feel sad for that family because I know death is so painful and I will try and be like that mom and fight for life and be more loving.